Sunday 19 July 2009

Charabanc To The South Of France and the Road To Santiago.

After my last day trip to France I decided that I would go again three days later with my Mum. My mum has said for the last few years that she wanted to do a day trip to the south of France and have lunch by the sea...being the good daughter that I am I decided to book it up but it didn't go quite to plan! For some reason we didnt check in on line (If I don't have bags to check in I always check in online). We arrived at LTN airport and all thier systems had gone down and this resulted in complet chaos at the airport. Our flight was due to go at 7am and at 10am they hadnt even started to check people in. Due to the fact that we was only going for a day trip we deciided to rescheduel for the following week and head to Brighton for the day. This would have been great exept the fact that we was clearly dressed for the beach and Brighton's weather was a little chilly! We headed to the Marina for a couple of drinks then got the bus back to town so I could buy a hoodie. We found a Jack Wills and I purchased a hoodie then we headed to the seafront for a couple of pints of beer...lovely! it wasn't how we planned our day but we made the most of it! The thing is, whenever me and my mum plan anything...something ALWAYS happens. She blames me and I blame her..its just the way it is :)

I then had a pretty busy week at work. It started off quiet with a week of standbys but ended up mad busy _ I suppose I shouldnt complain as there are alot of people out there out of work. But I was happy when my working week finished and day one off was spent with my mum in the south of france. I didnt really get alot of sleep the night before but managed to get up and make it to the airport in time. We had a fantastic and relaxing day in Nice. We had a lovely lunch on the beach and then spent the afternoon swimming/sunbathing and reading. The whole day stayed incident free which is a first for us...maybe the curse has been lifted! I then headed over to Hemel and I spent a great weekend with my nephew Jospeh. The weather was pretty rubbish all weekend so I decided to take him to the cinema. We brought the biggest ever bag of popcorn and a huge bag of sweets and watched ice age 3. Neither of us had seen ice age 1 or 2 so I wasnt sure if it was a good idea but the movie was really good and we both had a great time! The following day was spent in Hemel as Farrah was ill so Janice and Joespeh spent the day playing with cars, making car parks out of building blocks and watching Bolt (which actually made me cry...Im a little hormonal at the moment).

I then went back to work and spent most of my week in Dortmund. I havent had a night stop in ages then I was rostered two trips back to back. I had good crew and even though I wasnt feeling 100% I still had a couple of cheeky cocktails in uncle Toms. My weekend off was supposed to be spent in Sitges. We had planned this trip for ages and I was really looking forward to it but staff travel never became available. We didnt bother booking anything else up as we all had out hearts set on Sitges. I wasnt feeling great so a weekend at home was probably for the best. Farrah (my sister) had some trouble from an emotionally retarded fuckwit and was really upset by his cuntish behaviour! it turns out that everything happens for a reason and instead of going away Farrah and Joseph came over to mine for the weekend. I spent a weekend alcohol free which meant hangover free. We took Jospeh to the park, on the bouncy castle, to nandos, fed the ducks, we went to the cinema, we brought movies and had a trip to the disney store so Joseph could add to his collection of cars. we stayed in and watched movies and when Joesph went to bed we got take out and watched a Haunting in Conneticut! I havent had a weekend in for ages and I really enjoyed it.

Farrah and Joesph went back to Hemel on Monday and Harry and I headed to Thorpe Park so we could go on Saw and Stelth. Both Harry and I woke up feeling really ill so we didnt even make it to the Thorpe park til after midday. We still had alot of fun and spent the day scaring ourselves stupid. No matter how ill we felt I still had a great day and I was so glad we made the effort to go. I have however felt absolutly rotten ever since! I really was worried that I had the onset of swine flu as everyone around me seems to be coming down with it but I now seem to be over the worst. it wasnt swine flu but it was a horrid cold that has kept me confined to my bedroom for the past couple of days....Thankgod for MSN, twitter and facebook!

I have decided to try and take a months unpaid leave and do the 800km pilgramige "the road to Satiago" also known as "The Camino de Santiago" There is no real reason behind it...Its just something that I feel that I need to do. I suppose I need to find out if Im capable of becoming myself again as I seem to have lost my way a bit. Im not unhappy or depressed but I do feel that I need to do it. Im not setting out on a spiritual or religious journey its just a personl thing. If I get the time off then I will take one month unpaid leave and a further two weeks paid leave... Im hoping 6 weeks will be enough time to do it. I am lazy and I am unfit. I am a self confessed quitter and I know that no one thinks i'll actually do it - with the exeption of the Jew (David). I think that the Jew thinks i'll do it and I think he has faith in me. My friendship with the jew is strange becasuse in someways he knows me better than anyone and in other ways he hardly knows me at all. Its going to be tough physically and mentally but I honestly believe that if I can last the first week then I will make it to the end. I am happy in my life but Im not satisfied. I dont really know what I want from life and what im looking for. Sometimes I believe in fate and think that things will work themselves out, other times I think that you have to get off you ass and look for what you want. I need to give up the ghosts of my past once and for all and move on. I dont sit down and dwell on my past. I never have done this and never will but it doesnt mean that the past doesnt leave scars. By not dwelling doesnt mean that my attitude is healthy because I never really deal with past situations. I suppose Im scared of slowing down and falling into a deep depression that I may never recover from. I dont regret anything in my life and I believe that every experiance has made me the person that I am today. But there are scars and maybe this is my way of dealing with them. im aware that this sounds very "new age" but its far from it. I am 30 and have no responsibiltys, no kids, no mortgage. Work have said we can apply for unpaid leave so I figure this is the ideal opportunity to do something amazing! Quite frankly, all the people that have no faith in me can fuck off. Maybe it will be too tough and maybe I will end up quitting but I know that I want to give it my best shot! I haven't made any plans and the more Im reading about the the more worried I am about it. I know its going to be the toughest thing I have ever done but I honestly feel that its something that I need to do.

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